Happy Birthday Mom

Today, October 26th is my mom's birthday and she sits in an Ottawa hospital awaiting placement in a nursing home. She's recovered well from her stroke but remains disoriented and confused. As time goes on, she will become more confused and remember even less. She has already forgotten much of her past and I know that one day she will even forget who I am.

So while I still can, I believe it's important that I remember for her. I know that everyone says this about their moms but my mom was an incredible woman. No, she didn't discover a cure for cancer or solve world hunger or peace but she was incredible because she swam against the current of her time and tried to live her life differently. Her life may not have turned out as she would have liked and she did suffer greatly but along the way she had some pretty cool adventures.

I'd like to share one period of her life with you that had a tremendous influence on me throughout the years.

My mom was a from a Francophone community in Northern Ontario. Her father didn't believe in educating girls beyond grade six - why does a girl need an education when all she's going to do is change diapers? My mom argued with my grandfather and managed to stay in school until grade eight. After that, she would sneak out of the house to attend high school. I'm not sure if she managed to finish high school but when she was nineteen she started taking courses in typing and shorthand. By then World War Two had ended and she left home to find work.

One of her sisters had found a job in Ottawa working as a chambermaid at the historic Chateau Laurier hotel and mom left home to join her. Soon, her typing and shorthand skills landed her a job with Blue Cross in Toronto so she moved to Hogtown and lived there for four years until she accepted a transfer to a Blue Cross office in New York City.

I'm not exactly sure how long she worked for Blue Cross but her next job was to work for a man named Archie Bleyer. Mr. Bleyer had once been the band leader for Arthur Godfrey and in 1952 had started his own recording company he called Cadence Records.

Mom always fondly remembered Andy Williams, Phil and Don Everly (she said they were always polite, sweet boys), and Dorothy, Carol, Janet and Jinny of The Chordettes. Mom had friends in the secretarial pools of other record labels like RCA and Capitol and the gals used to swap disc jockey pressings of the 45s and albums of the day.

When my mom was pregnant with me, the gang at Cadence had a baby shower for her and all the label's stars were there to congratulate her. She left Cadence Records to stay home and be wife and mother but I always got the feeling that she missed the music business. But she hung on to all the records she collected while working for Cadence and these were the records I listened to growing up.

In our house we listened to all kinds of music from rock 'n roll to country, to pop, to big band, to classical. I grew up appreciating all kinds of music and it's small wonder that today I find myself married to a musician.

So to celebrate my mom's birthday here's a little video of a song she used to sing to me. Happy Birthday Mom!

Time and colour blindness

Last year, in my blog post Speak your mind even if your voice shakes, I wrote about an incident that happened at Pride where the emcee made a comment in reference to a Black performer about "not seeing colour". I received a couple negative comments in response to that post and couldn't help but think of that incident and the responses I received here when I heard an interview of Nigerian writer, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, on this morning's The Current on CBC radio.

Towards the end of the interview she speaks about her experience of coming to study in the US. When asked if she was surprised by the evidence of institutional racism in the US she said it was eye-opening for her. She said that she didn't know she was Black until she moved to the US and that living in the US means knowing that one is Black and that Blackness comes with so much baggage. She goes on to say that she believes that America's approach to race and class isn't honest, that there is a myth that everything is alright. She says that the myth that we live in a colour-blind society is a lie and that we shouldn't pretend that race doesn't matter. Hmm, looks like I'm not the only person who feels that way. You can listen to her interview by clicking here. You will need Real Player installed on your computer to listen to that file.

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Today, October 24th, is Take Back Your Time Day. Take Back Your Time Day is a project organized by an alliance of academics called the Simplicity Forum and members of Cornell University's Center for Religion, Ethics and Social Policy.

From the website at www.timeday.org:

TAKE BACK YOUR TIME is a major U.S./Canadian initiative to challenge the epidemic of overwork, over-scheduling and time famine that now threatens our health, our families and relationships, our communities and our environment.

Some of their mottos are - More time, less stuff. Time is a Family Value and Medieval peasants worked less than you do.

Job Posting

I'd apply but I already have a job so I'm passing this job lead along. I hear they are looking for a few good men. Sure hope they can find 1000 men who will measure up.

Had a little visitor today

My daughter-in-law Sue borrowed my car this morning so she could go down to the Ministry of Transportation office to write the exam for her D (truck) license. Sue's dad works for one of the local waste removal companies and has encouraged her to get her truck license and apply for a driving job for when she comes off maternity leave in March. She's a gal after my own heart, seeing as how I hold a D class license with a Z (air brake endorsement).

Anyhow, after passing her written exam she brought the car back to me and surprised me with her tiny passenger.

Here's little Eve at grandma's office at the Local. I think she'll make a fine shop steward one day.

The Ghost of Birthdays Past

Since birthdays are a time of reflection, I thought I'd share some photos of my past birthdays.


Here I am with my mom. This was taken not long after we came home to our apartment on Coster Street from St Francis Hospital in the Bronx.
Mom was 33 when she had me and I was her first.














These are my parents. This was taken when I was 2-1/2 months old. I'm not exactly sure where this picture was taken but from what I remember of the furnishings, I think it was taken at my godmother's house in Brooklyn.









This was my first birthday party! We had moved from Coster St. to a house on 222nd Street not far from White Plains Rd in the Bronx. I was five years old.








My next birthday party was held after we moved to Canada in our home in Ottawa. I was twelve and the dress I'm wearing here is my mom's second wedding dress.
It was the 70s - dig those bell bottomed sleeves!




This was my 33rd birthday. I think everyone should climb a tree when they turn 33 don't you?





This was my 35th birthday. This was my androgynous neo-feminist period. Thank heavens I grew out of that!

Mid-life

Well, today is my birthday. How do I feel? Well, the chorus of this song written by Merle Travis, sung by Tennessee Ernie Ford and released by Capitol Records on this date in 1956, says it all.

Tarbender, tee martoonies please